As for Bub's dream about moderating, I think it might be to do with being trusted with power/authority using moderating these forums as an analogy, you worry you might end up misusing it.
I really do worry if I misuse it, I never mean to be unjust in my actions. That is why I often end up stating if I do take action to seek another moderator for their opinion on it, or I discuss about what I should do on the secret moderation forum.
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