Author Topic: Beyond The War  (Read 982 times)

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Beyond The War
« on: April 02, 2015, 02:45:35 am »
Haven't wrote for way too long, so I'm a little rusty, expect updates to be sparse, I don't get a lot of time to write and this isn't a genre or style of writing I'm used to, so feedback and critique is welcomed.
I'll lay down the backstory first.

In 2034 America launched a surprise attack upon many European countries after the fall of NATO. Many countries were completely unprepared and unable to defend themselves from the highly advanced weaponry recently developed by America in secrecy. Only a few major European powers were able to hold out, for a short time, they were also subjected to the worst of the 12 year long war, with entire cities being completely wiped from existence.
Jack lives in Britain, one of the last countries to fall during the war, one of the few countries still heavily occupied by American soldiers. His parents were taken, or killed, during the war and he now survives however he can in the remains of his home city. He is not alone though, he survives with his friends, more like his family now, some he knew before the war and some he befriended with during the darkest hours of the war.

Americans

The Soldiers didn't even bother knocking on the door, barely attached to the wall on rusted hinges. Instead they just loudly barged into the remains of the house, only a few ground floor rooms, most without a ceiling, as they always did when they occasionally checked the area for 'Rebels', those too bold to be shipped away to work camps or accept tyranny. It was early in the morning, the winter sun hadn't yet risen and the last thing Jack needed was to be woken up by an angry man shining a light in his face, screaming at him and his family to get up until his face turned a bright shade of red, as well as pointing a gun at him as if it would even scare him any more. Of course when a man points a gun at you and tells you to line up against the wall while an entire squad of soldiers carelessly ransack your home, looking for anything even slightly incriminating so they can shoot you, or worse, take you away, you listen to him without question or complaint, just in case they decide they want to make sure they find something incriminating that you didn't know was there before. It was always the same drill anyway, he'd gotten quite used to it, stand there silently until they were done, and then wait for them to leave and go back to bed for another hour or two, cleaning up was pointless because they'd usually just come back and do it again soon, maybe to catch you out, maybe just for fun.

Back before the war it was inconceivable for this to ever happen, especially with American Soldiers, but their corrupt Government fell during the war, it was the perfect time for a revolt with almost all of their countries military capability thousands of miles away. After the fall of the American Government most of their military just carried on, realising that they could take whatever they wanted for themselves now, forming their own command chains and following their own orders, most became abusive. Little more than terrorist captors, except they weren't just taking people hostage, they were taking entire countries hostage. The revolt back in America was violently subdued and the entire country is run by an egomaniacal warlord, although nobody is quite sure who, all they know is that they're the one coordinating supplies to the American Soldiers all around the world, they're the one keeping them in power.

This time he got woken up by something less irritating, although just as unpleasant, as his dog Salvator decided that licking his face was clearly the best way to wake him up today. He'd found Salvator, or rather, Salvator found him, he'd been hurt when he accidentally got caught in the middle of a firefight between American and British soldiers, towards the end of the war. Salvator dragged him out of the way and saved his life, even took a bullet for him during it. He'd sat behind a car thinking they were both going to die before retreating British soldiers carried them both away and tended to their wounds. Now here he was, sitting there expectantly, waiting to be fed. Food was always scarce and there was hardly enough to go around for Jack and the three others, but nobody minded sparing some food for Salvator, he was as much a part of the family as anyone else was after all he'd done for them all, especially considering he found most of the food.

It was time to go out scavenging, it's how Jack and the others got by, they refused to take the 'donations' from the Americans because it was usually too dangerous, you'd be killed, raped or beaten by them most of the time but some people just didn't have any other choice. That wasn't going to happen to Jacks family. He unburied himself from the pile of torn blankets and rags he slept under and lazily got himself dressed. Wearing little more than dirty, ragged t-shirt, jeans that were far too ripped and the only intact leather jacket he'd found he walked to the back room of the house, where everyone else slept, the cold stone floor making his bare feet almost numb already. He collected his scavenging supplies quietly, trying not to wake the others and prepared to head out with Salvator, maybe he'd find something nice for breakfast today. Just as he was about to leave Lilith stopped him, she was watching the door to make sure nobody broke in, she was an aged and scrawny woman, not able to put up much of a fight if anyone did try to come in but everyone had to take turns staying up while everyone else slept, it was the only way to stay safe. "Jack, make sure you come back safe, you know I hate it when you sneak out like this." She had a kind voice, the sort you'd expect from a caring grandmother, she'd always acted like the groups grandmother too, fussing over everyone all the time. "Don't worry, I've got Sal' with me, he won't let anything happen".

Scavenging had been getting tough lately, and dangerous, there were always more patrols around and they didn't take kindly to people 'stealing' just to survive, but Jack had gotten pretty good at avoiding them and Salvator always knew to lead him away from them, the only problem they ever had was when the patrols had dogs with them, they'd had a few scary encounters with the German Shepard's and Rottweilers the Americans used, but it'd always turned out alright.
Scrambling through piles of broken rubble and half collapsed houses was proving fruitless so far though, although Salvator didn't seem to care at all, happily rummaging around anywhere he got the chance to, his tail optimistically wagging about constantly.  Suddenly Jack was violently thrown to the ground, a sharp pain in his shoulder as a bullet tore through him. Snipers. He screamed in shock more than anything "Sal', run, go home!" As his faithful companion rushed towards him, ready to attack the first thing that moved. He dragged himself up, ready to run, it was too late, a second gunshot rang out, this one much closer, the round hit Jack in almost the same place, staggering him. He looked up to see an American patrol heading straight for him, weapons raised. "Move and we'll fire, stay right where you are" they screamed at him. There were only three of them but they were too close to run from, and Salvator had already begun running towards them, snarling and baring his teeth. He knew it was over, the third shot struck Salvator and he crashed to the ground, two more shots made sure he wouldn't get back up. Tears welled in his eyes, he knew that he wasn't making it out of this and he almost didn't want to.

He lay there, bleeding and crying, as the soldiers advanced towards him. He thought that this was it, it was all over, until one of the soldiers stepped on a landmine. Flesh, blood and bone painted the surrounding area and everyone nearby as the remaining soldiers screamed and scrambled to cover. Men and women with guns appeared from seemingly nowhere in an instant and opened fire on the confused and disorientated soldiers. Jack lay there still, covering his ears from the deafening sounds of gunfire that lasted only a few short seconds. He slowly tried to lift himself off the ground as a black haze spread its way across his vision and everything became blurry, three men approached him, he collapsed again, unconscious.
« Last Edit: April 07, 2015, 01:01:35 am by SiegeLion »
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Re: Beyond The War
« Reply #1 on: April 02, 2015, 02:58:15 am »
Pretty good. I'm interested to see where this is going to be going.

Rhodri

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Re: Beyond The War
« Reply #2 on: April 02, 2015, 02:59:12 am »
Spoiler: Relevant (hover to show)

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Re: Beyond The War
« Reply #3 on: April 02, 2015, 03:04:03 am »
It's not going to be a happy story, I can say that much.

That was incredibly relevant, Rhodri, that's sort of how most of the Americans are going to be portrayed
"WERE FUCKIN AWESOME, SO FUCKIN AWESOME THAT WE SHOULD BE DICKS TO EVERYONE ELSE"
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Re: Beyond The War
« Reply #4 on: April 02, 2015, 03:07:20 am »
It's not going to be a happy story, I can say that much.

That was incredibly relevant, Rhodri, that's sort of how most of the Americans are going to be portrayed
"WERE FUCKIN AWESOME, SO FUCKIN AWESOME THAT WE SHOULD BE DICKS TO EVERYONE ELSE"

Which was actually the point that Team America was trying to get across. The only reason that Team America has to do the things they do is in their theme, "AMERICA!" Why are we invading Iran? "AMERICA!" Why are we killing all these Russians? "AMERICA!"

And I hope it ain't a happy story, we need more soul crushing emptiness on what is generally a happy shitposty forum.

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Re: Beyond The War
« Reply #5 on: April 02, 2015, 03:45:42 am »
Spoiler (hover to show)
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Re: Beyond The War
« Reply #6 on: April 03, 2015, 06:43:37 pm »
... you know, I actually thought about running a forum game based on something similar to this, with a "New World Order" taking the place of the government force.

I'm interested to see where you take this.
unless you are trying accommodate a massive pair of testicles or hiding a secret booze pouch, your pants are far too large.

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Re: Beyond The War
« Reply #7 on: April 05, 2015, 03:01:40 am »
Updated the first chapter, although I might rewrite that last part.
Ive got a second story being written right now, something I'm more used to writing so it'll probably take precedence over this one, I'll likely post it once I've got a bit more of it written.
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Re: Beyond The War
« Reply #8 on: April 07, 2015, 01:06:40 am »
First part is done, another little paragraph at the end there to finish it off, moving onto the second part now, again I'll update this post as I get more done, eventually I'll move it all into the first post with spoilers for each part if I can.

Mercy

"Hey kid, wake up. You need to get eat something, don't sit up too fast, take it nice and slow, you'll be fine"
"Let him rest longer, he's not in stable enough condition right now"
"Look at him, Sid, he looks like he'd die of starvation at any moment, never mind his injuries, kid's gotta eat"

Jack opened his eyes slowly to reveal a brightly lit room and two men standing over him, one holding a tray of food, the other staring at him through thick glasses, dressed like a surgeon, a thick ginger beard covering most of his rough face and blending into his long, tatted mane of hair. He spoke passable English with a thick Russian accent and a cheery, optimistic voice "Friend, you are lucky to be alive right now, my name is Sidrovich, my friend is Joseph, you would be dead if he had not brought you down here to me. I could do nothing for your sobaka, I am sorry, I am not veterinarian." He stared blankly at the two men, trying to work out what was going on, eventually he settled on asking "Where the hell am I? Are you rebels? When can I leave? I want to go home"
Both men glanced at each other before Joseph spoke "You're underground at the minute mate, right underneath where you were when we found you, I guess you got lucky to get shot right at our front door, you let us know the bastards were coming, sorry about your dog. Anyway, yeah I guess we're the rebels you been hearing about so much lately, although I prefer to think of us as everyone who decided we're sick of the fuckin' Yanks, which is basically everyone when you think about it." He had a rough southern accent, sounding just as optimistic as Sidrovich did, his tone of voice shifted quickly however, as a concerned look crept onto his face. "You're a boroughs kid aren't you? Look, sorry, I don't think you're gonna be able to go back home mate. It's not there anymore"
Formerly SiegeLion

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leather made from foreskin.
yeah, i'd punch an old lady.
Everything's gunpowder if you have enough oxidizer.
It can only mean the shenangularity.

 

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