Utterly Mad

[[Your sassy black mentor from the 8th sassmension is here to save yo' white ass.]]

Vi, and the traveling fashionista

"I'm getting sick of having to save yo' ass every time you decide to pop yo' magical Tic-Tacs.", she grabs your hand and jerks you to your feet. "And maybe if you'd quit trying to swim in sinks, maybe it wouldn't look like you've gone and p1ssed yourself, girl!" She shook her head as she hands you a towel to dry your swimming adventure off. "Now, you're going to give me those colorful Joys and yous' is going to get yourself straightened out and ready for bed. Maybe if you weren't such a wreck, then maybe I wouldn't have to double as your PR agent as'well." She then hugs you. "But I love you, you're like the sister I never had, so come on bring it in, bring it in." She hugs you harder, hopping you'll pull some of that lovin' her way.

You're unbreakable...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYNbp0u8WjAI'll try to lay off the sistah hood humor.

Michael, in serious land

The finish their chips, and right on the spot a waiter appears with another bowl of piping hot chips.

"But to change the subject real quick, anyone getting kinda freaked out by those dudes wearing the gasmasks?"

"Not really, I mean there's a chemical weapons threat from Al-Quida. Of course there's going to be dudes in masks and those "banana suits"."

"I thought they said it was IZIZ?"

"Does it really matter? It's one of those group of assholes out in the dunes."

"Or it could be the Ruskies. Aren't they trying to get back what they lost in WWII?"

"Nah..."

"Nah..."

They continue their chatter a bit longer, spouting some pretty 'uncivilized' things about races in the Middle East along with some stuff about "commie bastards"; before the topic ultimately goes back to sports. Something about a football game you've already seen, and some stuff about the local team.